Why I am starting this-here new blog

For several years, I’ve been happily (and sporadically) blogging at OLD BLOG, Girl on Girl Action. But now I am changing to NEW BLOG.

Why? WELL. So a while back, my beloved uncle John died. He was a hilarious, brilliant guy, and his too-early death was a total drag.

Also, while we were at a memorial dinner for him, something terrible happened.

My uncle’s cousin was there, and at some point during the dinner, somebody mentioned that “Elana has a blog” and the cousin said “Oh yes?” and then somebody mentioned the title, “Girl on Girl Action”, and then he said “But how will I find it?”

And then somebody said “You should just google “girl on girl action”” and then an entire room full of people said “NO WAIT.”

And then he looked confused and said “But why not?!?” and then

AN ENTIRE ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE EXPERIENCED THE AWKWARD OF TRYING TO EXPLAIN TO AN ELDERLY MOURNER WHAT “GIRL ON GIRL ACTION” MEANS.

It was a really “…” moment in my life. And even at the time I thought “Oh man, I should totally change the name of my blog”. It just, you know… took me many months to actually get around to it.

Anyway, new blog! It’s better and more desirable than old blog.

(You may be wondering something like “why did you name your blog after a slang term for ladies doin’ it with ladies, if you didn’t want to have to explain it to the uninitiated?”

BECAUSE I DIDN’T REALIZE HOW… you know… I don’t know! I never know these things! I just thought it was funny. Because I’m an idiot. This stuff happens to me all the time.

I have probably already told you these stories, but they were on OLD blog. So here you go:

1. Once I bought a shirt with a number on the front. And I thought nothing of it until I realized that a weird statistical cluster of men kept smirking at me whenever I wore it, and saying things like “That’s my lucky number!” and then I finally realized that the number was 69, and… and YOU KNOW.

2. Once I met a girl who was wearing a shirt with two cartoon characters floating in space. And I said “I like your shirt with two cartoon characters floating in space! Is it a 2001: SPACE ODYSSEY reference?” and she looked at me like there was something wrong with me and said “Um, they’re doing it.” and I realized that this was true and said “Oh.” PS THIS HAPPENED WHEN I WAS 28.

3. Once, before we got married, Husband Guy and I were driving somewhere. And a car pulled up next to us, and it had one of those hand-gesture stickers on it – like so – and I said “What does that mean?” and there was a very long silence and I looked over and he looked back at me incredulously and said “Do you seriously not know?” and I said “Is it some kind of “Eastside” reference? and he said “…no.” and I said “Come on, explain!” and he said “I don’t want to.” but finally he explained and then I was TOTALLY SCANDALIZED THAT YOU CAN JUST DRIVE AROUND WITH THAT ON YOUR CAR, what if your MOM asks you about it?

Basically, this kind of being-a-moron is a theme in my life. But NO MORE!

(I hope.))

(Is that right? I get confused about parentheses.)

Anyway… new blog. Also I could pretend that I’m totally going to update it much more frequently than I did old blog, but that would be, you know… a well-meaning lie.

Happy 2011! May this be your year!

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8 Responses to Why I am starting this-here new blog

  1. Janiece says:

    Welcome back, Elena. And don’t feel bad – I’m socially retarded, too. Obviously.

  2. Maggie says:

    Hurray! I’m always afraid I’ll get in trouble with the smut-catcher software at work with your old site. One place blocked it just for the title alone. Plus then there’s cognitive dissonance because I cuss like “rats!” and “dang!”Anyway more Elana writing, whatever the route to get there, yay!

  3. Nathan says:

    So now I’ve gotta change the link on my sidebar!

    &@^@^^^@**##$!

  4. me says:

    Don’t feel bad. I had to wikipedia that shocker hand gesture, ’cause I was clueless too. Ew.
    Also, I can now have your blog on my goggle reader page without feeling awkward if someone sees it at work. That was a very uncomfortable time around the dinner table. Hope you will be posting often and oftener.

  5. Anna says:

    Great new blog – and of course I’m asking for an explanation. Never heard of (or seen) that particular hand gesture.

  6. Cher says:

    I don’t know that hand gesture either.
    But glad to see you blogging again.

  7. Lloyd says:

    You write funny good

  8. FUNNY as HELL!!!! BTW – I’m Aimee’s sister….

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